


Close to the heart

by Roostertease_it



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-11
Updated: 2015-02-11
Packaged: 2018-03-11 21:48:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3334067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roostertease_it/pseuds/Roostertease_it
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lindsays growing obsession with hate comments leads Michael to intervene.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Close to the heart

 

Lindsay had never wanted to join in on lets plays, she was always hesitant though the others, especially Geoff and Michael encouraged her to join in on them often. Sometimes she would agree to take part in a lets play and then chicken out before, deciding it was better to lie and say she had work to do.

She had always feared the comments of hate she was bound to receive, It was inevitable she was a woman and this was you-tube, what could she expect.

Eventually they convinced her to join in on some lets plays replacing one of the guys if they weren't available. After this she became obsessed with the comments people left about her, whether they were good or bad, she'd read them all.

It got worse when she joined the versus rota, there was uproar when this happened a flood of hate came after and it didn't die down for over two weeks. It never stopped, everything she was the reigning champion or challenged someone there were complaints. The most popular one occurred whenever she happened to win a versus “they let her win because she's a girl”. It made her blood boil to read those at first, they undermined her win like it didn’t mean anything simply because she was a girl.

Lindsay was in the same place as she always was. In her and Michael's living room sat on the couch with her laptop balanced on her knees. She was constantly on the internet or, more specifically, on you-tube.

Lindsay scrolled through the endless pages of hate comments directed at her, the bright white of the you-tube page reflecting off her unblinking eyes, the darkness making her feel alone.

A lot of the weak ones didn't bother her, but the ones she convinced herself were true were the ones that hurt the most, maybe she was a waste of space, maybe her voice was annoying, maybe she was a bit on the heavy side. But the worst, always the worst, were the rape comments.

A lot of them would go into graphic detail about what they'd do to her, if they had the chance, it made her sick to the stomach and her hands shake. Reading what these people thought was terrifying, how had they come up with this?. Who in their right mind would type this up, post it, and genuinely mean it?, who?.

Lindsay wiped at her eye, noticing a stray tear that had fallen without her knowing. She sniffed deeply and took a deep breath.

She jumped as the door opened, sending a streak of light into the darkness that momentarily blinded her.

“Lindsay?” Michael asked, stepping into the darkness then switching on the light“why are you sitting in the dark?”

She quickly snapped her laptop shut, scouring the entirety of her mind for a reasonable explanation, other than it just felt right to be sad in the dark rather than the light and stuttered “I..I, well, I like it that way, I guess”

Michael shook his head of puffy hair and smiled brightly at her “whatever floats your boat” he strode past her into the kitchen “Want a coffee?”

“No” Lindsay replied “I'm.. I'm gonna head up to bed, I'm a little tired”

“But it's only nine o'clock” He called from the kitchen “you never go to sleep that early, are you okay?, are you sick?”

“No, no, I just have a small headache and I worked a bit too hard at work today” Lindsay got up, grabbed her things and paced swiftly towards the door, hoping to avoid any further questions.

“Okay” she heard Michael say before she disappeared upstairs.

She got changed and curled up in her bed, desperately wishing that sleep would come quickly, but it didn't, it never did.

Mental screen-shots of you-tube comments flooded her mind, she thought about them for hours and the ones that made particular impressions on her could be backed up in her head for weeks before she could move on.

Eventually she always fell asleep. But the comments invaded her dreams, in there the words from the screen became voiced, they were shouted at her by faces she didn't know. Some nights she would wake up crying, thankfully never loud enough for Michael to hear.

For the whole of the next day Lindsay was nervous. A lets play where she had replaced Gavin was scheduled to be uploaded that night and she was in no way looking forward to that. The comments were always worse when she replaced anyone apart from Jack.

“what's up?” Michael asked Lindsay just after they had finished videoing a couple go's for the next few weeks.

The question caught Lindsay off guard and she stumbled over her words “There's nothing – I... why are you asking?”

Michael sighed at her weak attempt to make him believe there was nothing wrong “You've got bags the size of suitcases under your eye's and you've smiled what?, like two times today, of course there's something wrong”

She stared blankly back at him, again trying to find an excuse “I'm a little sick, remember I went to bed early yesterday” she provided him with an obviously fake smile.

Michael was sceptical looking at her with one of his eyebrows raised to the roof “You're sick” He said simply “just sick... and you're sure there's nothing else wrong, at all?”

She laughed awkwardly, trying desperately to brush off michael's questions “Yes, Michael I'm sure I’m just sick”

Michael still appeared dubious “well you know you can tell me absolutely anything, that's what this means” he said shaking his ring finger at her “even if you killed a man.

She laughed nervously at his joke and sighed a sigh of pure unadulterated relief as he walked off to record a minecraft let's play.

When she finally got some alone time at home that night she retreated into her usual position on the couch and brought the new video up. She braced herself before scrolling down. Almost immediately she found some hate directed towards her.

The first warning sign was the person's (most likely a straight white male aged teen to mid twenties) avatar which was a picture of a _very_ scantily clad prepubescent anime girl at which she groaned, but the his you-tube handle, if it were possible was worse. It was Fedorabrony420 a mix of three of the most vibrant red flags that there could possibly be.

She moved on from the handle and the avatar and onto the comment.

 

 _ **Fedorabrony420**_ **:** Lindsay isn't even funny, she tries way to hard!!!! and she always copies the other guys humour

 

“tries too hard” Lindsay grumbled to herself “I don't even try to be funny and why would I copy them, they're not even funny” she laughed at her joke but could feel a niggle of doubt in herself that scratched at the back of her mind, did she copy them?, did she try too hard?.

She scrolled down and didn't have to go far before finding another.

This time it was the rage face; memes, another red flag. What made it worse was that the rage face was, of course wearing (the other red flag), a fedora.

 

 _ **Lolololololololololololol:**_ lets be real we all know lindsey got the job because she married Michael, just saying.

 

“I didn't even _know_ him when I got the job” she muttered “And I was dating someone else” A thought crept into her mind, That's the reason you're in videos though isn't it, she shook it off saying to herself “he didn't even spell my name right”.

The next commenter's avatar was, thankfully, the one you-tube gave you when you first made an account. The handle was much more offensive to the eye. xx_achieve_xx. Lindsay’s mouth down-turned at the sight of the middle school-esque handle and hurried onto their comment.

 

_**xx_achieve_xx:** _ Lindsay's so ugly !!!!! how does Michael stand it!!!

 

These ones always made her feel like she was undeserving of Michael. It made her feel like he had made a mistake in even wanting to date her in the first place.

Lindsay pushed the laptop and shuffled quickly over to the bathroom to relieve herself. She hurried back and the room felt somehow different when she returned, like something had changed, something had been moved but she couldn't quite figure out what it was. Eventually She shrugged and resumed her position on the couch.

She refreshed the page and scrolled back down and saw that someone had replied to these comments.

Underneath Fedorabrony420's post was a reply saying “Lindsay's always funny whether she tries or not and why would she copy us?, we're not even funny”

“us” she whispered “we're?” her eyes flicked to the you-tube handle LtMkilla, It was Michael!. The rely had over five hundred likes in the last five minutes. Underneath people were agreeing with Michael with things like “Lindsay's awesome” “She is soooooo funny!!!!!, idiots”.

She scrolled further down and saw he had replied to Lolololololololololololol.

 

 _ **LtMkilla:**_ Are you serious, like really, the first time I met Lindsay I ignored her, I was at work.... at rooster teeth. Also it's not spelled lindsey it's LindsAy, with an “A”.

 

She went on quickly to the last he'd replied to, which was xx_achieve_xx's comment.

 

 _ **LtMkilla:**_ Are you blind? Are glasses something you need? I think you need to go on a trip to the opticians pretty fucking soon Because she is one beautiful son of a bitch and I couldn’t have married a more perfect woman. And if someone is undeserving it is most definitely me.

 

There was one more underneath that Had been replied to, but not by Michael by someone else.

 

_**Mastaaacheeeeff:** _ Lindsays so fat.. why is she so fat?????

 

This was a comment Lindsay saw all too often and consistently, every time she saw it, it considerably lowered her confidence and self esteem. However the reply to this comment was one of the best things she read in her entire life.

 

_**Flowerprincegavin:** _ Lindsay is big because she is full of sunshine, smiles, happiness and the purest kittens you are full of dried shit and stale cat piss.

 

She liked it so much because it didn't dismiss her size and call her skinny because she wasn't. She was big  _ and  _ beautiful because those two thing aren't, and never will be, mutually exclusive.

Again people had replied to this comment with a surplus of positivity. She smiled a bright, genuine smile. She knew that she'd never be the favourite and people would never cheer if she replaced someone popular but _some_ of them liked her and that was enough.

Happy tears began to stream noiselessly down her face as she scrolled through the abundance of love comment for her, this time describing how hard they would hug her if they met her.

She heard Michaels feet padding down the hallway and looked up as he burst through the door and ran over to her, he took the laptop off her, pulled her off the sofa, cupped her face and planted a soft kiss on her mouth and then her cheek.

He looked deep into her eyes and stated firmly “Fuck them”

She glanced towards the discarded laptop, Michael turned her chin gently to face him again. “They don't know you, _I_ know you and I love the shit out of you”

Lindsay's lip quivered and she threw her arms around Michael's torso and squeezed. She buried her face in his chest, letting her tears, the comments and the negativity all flow out in sobs.

Michael wrapped one of his arms around her comfortingly and used the other to hold and pet her head.

Lindsay nodded gently and a choked sob came out with “thank you” she pulled away from Michael slightly and looked into his eyes whispering a shaky “Fuck them”

A silence fell between the two lasting only a few moments before Michael broke it “Dried shit and stale cat piss eh?” he said “I wish I would’ve thought of that one”

Lindsay laughed, her face brightening “Yeah” she replied “me too”

 

 


End file.
